The Etiquette Guide: 6 Things Your Hair Stylist Secretly Wishes You Knew

Getting your hair done should feel straightforward, but many appointments run into avoidable issues. Stylists often keep quiet about the little things that would make the process easier for them and better for you.

This guide highlights six key things your hair stylist secretly wishes you knew, so you can walk into your next appointment prepared, respectful and confident about the results.

1. Honesty Is Your Best Accessory

If you’ve ever sat down in front of a mirror and nodded politely when your stylist asked about your hair habits. “Yes, I deep-condition weekly,” “No, I never use box dye”,you’re not alone. But the truth is that stylists can usually tell when you’re fibbing.

They’re not looking for perfection when they ask, they’re looking for honesty. If you colored your hair at home, skipped trims for a year or heat-style daily without protection, it’s not a confession to be ashamed of. It’s vital information. Without it, your stylist has to play detective, and the results may not be what you imagined.

Being upfront about your routine helps them tailor recommendations and treatments that actually work for you, not for some idealized version of your hair. Imagine going to the doctor and leaving out key symptoms, you wouldn’t get the right prescription. The salon chair works the same way.

2. A Reference Photo Is Worth a Thousand Words

Hair vocabulary is a tricky thing. “Just a trim” can mean half an inch to you and three to your stylist. “Layers” might conjure visions of feathered waves for one person and subtle face-framing pieces for another. Words alone create room for misinterpretation.

That’s why stylists quietly cheer when clients pull out reference photos. A picture doesn’t lock you into a cookie-cutter style, it opens the door to a conversation. Your stylist can point out how the cut or color works with the model’s face shape, hair texture, or skin tone, and then explain how it might translate to you.

3. Respect the Clock, Both Theirs and Yours

Salons run on tightly packed schedules and a single late arrival can ripple across the day like dominoes. Stylists may not voice their frustration if you stroll in 20 minutes late, but it often forces them to rush your service or cut corners to stay on track for the next client.

On the flip side, arriving too early isn’t always helpful either, stylists need transition time between clients to sanitize tools, prep stations, or grab a quick break.

The sweet spot is arriving right on time. If you’re running late, a quick call gives your stylist the chance to adjust. And if you need a service that’s more time-intensive than you originally booked, say, highlights instead of a simple cut, give the salon a heads-up before showing up. It’s a small courtesy that keeps the day flowing smoothly for everyone.

4. Clean Hair Isn’t Always the Best Hair

Many clients scrub their hair squeaky-clean before a salon visit, thinking they’re doing their stylist a favor. In reality, overly fresh hair can sometimes work against you.

For color services, a little natural oil on your scalp acts as a protective barrier, reducing irritation and improving dye absorption. For updos, a bit of texture makes the hair more pliable and easier to hold.

Of course, there’s a difference between “not freshly washed” and “unclean.” Showing up with heavy product buildup, oil slicks or days-old tangles makes the process harder for your stylist. A good rule of thumb is to wash your hair 24 to 48 hours before your appointment unless your stylist specifies otherwise.

5. Speak Up But Trust the Expertise

There’s a delicate balance between voicing your preferences and micromanaging your stylist. On one hand, silence can lead to a cut or color you didn’t really want. On the other hand, constant second-guessing makes it harder for your stylist to get into their creative flow.

Stylists love feedback when it’s collaborative: “I’m worried about losing too much length,” or “I’d like the blonde to be more golden than ash.” These are clear, actionable preferences. What tends to wear them down are running commentaries like watching every snip with anxiety or questioning every product choice mid-service.

6. Gratitude Goes a Long Way

Stylists don’t expect a dramatic thank-you speech after every cut, but acknowledgment matters. Complimenting the results, tipping fairly or simply expressing appreciation for the time and effort goes further than you think.

This isn’t about formality, it’s about mutual respect. When you show that you value their work, your stylist is more motivated to invest in your experience. Over time, these small gestures build the kind of client-stylist relationship that makes each visit feel less like a transaction and more like catching up with a trusted friend.

Conclusion

These six simple etiquette habits create a ripple effect: smoother appointments, better communication and a stronger relationship with the person responsible for shaping how you look and feel.

At the end of the day, stylists aren’t wishing for perfection, they’re wishing for partnership. And when clients bring that to the chair, the outcome is always more beautiful than the cut or color alone.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Should I wash my hair right before a haircut?

Not necessarily. Clean hair isn’t harmful for a haircut, but freshly washed strands can sometimes be harder to work with, especially if they’re silky and slip out of the stylist’s hands. Washing the day before is usually ideal.

2. How much should I tip my hair stylist?

In many places, 15–20% of the service cost is considered standard. If your stylist went above and beyond or squeezed you in at the last minute, a little extra is always appreciated.

3. What if I don’t like the result of my appointment?

Don’t stay silent. A professional stylist would rather know immediately and try to adjust than have you leave unhappy. Be polite but direct: explain what feels off, and give them the opportunity to fix it.

4. Is it rude to bring photos of celebrities or influencers as references?

Not at all. Stylists prefer having a clear visual starting point. Just keep in mind that your hair type, face shape, and lifestyle may affect how closely your results resemble the picture. Use it as inspiration, not a demand for an exact replica.